Why Financial Independence Is Better With Friends

I enjoy attending and even hosting personal finance/FI meetups. Whether it involves a structured format like a presentation/case study or it’s a more informal gathering such as simply getting together for coffee or a beer, it’s always fun to hang out with like-minded people.

The majority of the meetups I attend are in my local area, because obviously it’s much more convenient, can be more frequent, and there are a lot less logistical headaches (i.e. not having to book travel, lower expenses, etc). However, I do also like to attend some of the bigger events once or twice a year such as EconoMe, CampFI, Camp Mustache, and most recently FinCon.

I’ve tried talking some of my local friends into attending one of these larger events with me, but everyone always seems hesitant. While most of the time there’s a fear of the unknown (i.e. what if it doesn’t turn out well?) or perhaps it’s too hard to take time off work, one of my friends recently questioned the whole reason for even attending…

He wondered what the point was of spending so much time, money, and effort traveling across the country to meet people who he may never see again… Was there even a need to be part of a community? Wasn’t it better to just build relationships in his local area instead?

I responded that these events are well worth attending for two reasons: 1) for the sharing of technical knowledge and 2) to meet others and build friendships (which is the main reason I attend). In my opinion technical knowledge is already easily-accessible via multiple sources such as podcasts, books, blogs, etc. What is impossible to replicate in isolation are the social connections, which is where the real value of in-person events are.

I completely understand my friend’s point of view and don’t fault him one bit for thinking this way, especially since I’ve had this exact same line of thinking in the past. But over the years my views have changed as I’ve learned about other people’s experiences and have had many more of my own.

Building Community

I’ve been self-sufficient and self-engaged much of my life, perfectly happy being alone and finding my own way through things. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve always had a small group of very close friends; I was just never one of those people who actively sought social connections and felt a need to always be around others.

Much of my early personal finance journey was the exact same way, I educated myself and saved & invested on my own. At the time, this made perfect sense to me since money is such a taboo topic; I really never expected to talk to others about it.

This started to change when I discovered Financial Independence & the associated community many years later. By listening to podcasts, I learned that there were so many people out there who were in similar, yet still unique financial circumstances. The hosts on these FI podcasts quickly became my new “virtual community” where the only downside was that these were always one-way conversations provided to me via my headphones or the car stereo.

This scenario continued on for years where I learned so much from so many different people. Not only was it great to pick up technical knowledge, but it was great to learn about other people’s unique situations. Everything was fine for a while, but it always felt like there was something missing, which I soon realized were immersive conversations and real-life interactions. There’s a limit to how much growth & learning that can happen alone without added contributions from others.

After some hesitation (because of course I’m an introvert), I built-up the courage to seek those in-person experiences, beginning first with local ChooseFI meetups then eventually with the larger events.

Meeting People In-Person

So I bet you’re dying to know how everything has turned out…

To sum it up in one word – EXCELLENT. (And as a bonus, to sum it up in two words – LIFE CHANGING).

In all seriousness, building community & relationships by attending in-person events has had such a positive impact in my life. There’s no alternate way to replicate the true back-and-forth dialogue and exchange of ideas that comes with meeting people and interacting with them face-to-face.

Some of the benefits that myself or others have experienced include:

Accountability & spurring action. By discussing personal goals & plans with others, there’s an inherent level of public accountability. For many people there might even be a level of shame or embarrassment if someone follows up and no progress has been made. Conversely, some people may intentionally seek accountability partners to help keep them on track.
Finding support or mentors. Learning or going through life in isolation is fine, but inevitably all of us hit roadblocks at some point and could use help. There are so many people in the FI community who are extremely knowledgeable and are further along in their financial journeys. I’ve found that almost everyone is willing to help others because they’ve most likely been in the same situation before.
Exposure to new people with different ideas & experiences. Hopefully this one is painfully obvious and doesn’t need much additional explanation. Yes, things like podcasts, books, blogs, etc all provide exposure to new things, but there’s a whole new level when someone can ask questions and really dig into more details of another person’s situation.

Going Beyond Local

Now understanding the importance of building community in-person, is there any advantage to only connecting with others locally or is there a good reason to attend some of the larger FI events?

I personally think there are many benefits to meeting others on a larger-scale.

More bites at the apple. We connect with others on varying levels; many times it’s very superficial, but if we’re lucky we make deeper & longer-lasting bonds with select people. So logically it makes sense that the greater number of people we’re exposed to would lead to a greater chance of finding those we can truly relate to.
Broader range of diversity. By casting a wider net, there is more opportunity to become exposed to unique ideas, varied perspectives, or different life circumstances. Oftentimes people in different parts of the world have unique experiences that they can share (based on geography, cultural habits, etc). For example, I’ve met many Midwesterners who invest heavily in real estate because home prices are much lower than here on the West Coast where this type of investing is much less prevalent.
Unexpected opportunities may emerge. Perhaps nothing will come from attending events, but more often than not, I’ve found that you just never know what sort of opportunities can arise. I know of many podcast/business-collaborations that have formed, people have found travel partners, and there are just more chances to spend time with others engaging in fun/social events.

Also, to dispel the notion of never seeing these people again, while that is a possible outcome, I haven’t found that to be true. I’ve met so many people at various events across the country and while I don’t see them on a regular basis, with technology these days it’s not too hard to keep in-touch. Plus, if I ever find myself traveling to various parts of the country (for whatever reason), there’s a good chance that I’ll have a friend in that area already.

In fact, it may be sad to admit but there are actually more people across the country that I keep in touch with than some of my old friends & co-workers who live in my local area!

Stepping Into The Real-World

At the end of the day, I highly encourage everyone to attend an in-person event, whether it’s a small meetup just across town or a larger event that takes more time, preparation, and effort to attend. I know that for many people there is a huge barrier to transitioning from the virtual world to meeting people in-person, but I guarantee that once you take that first step it’ll get easier & easier and lead to life-changing results.

Borrowing a phrase from Diania Merriam, “FI is Better with Friends”.

Links/Resources

Reader Questions

Have you ever attended any in-person personal finance or FI meetups? If so, what was your experience like and what are you looking forward to at future events?

Leave your answers or comments below – or email us directly at info@epicfinancialjourney.com